I know, I haven't blogged for ages. That isn't good enough either...forgive me! Life has got busy, work has got busy, but I haven't forgotten about you!
I'll keep it short.
We have all said we are going to 'try' to do something.
What you are really saying, is you will make an attempt or effort to do something.
Fair enough. I know, that on the surface, we all want to try to do our absolute best. But deep down, trying is a subconscious attempt to protect our own mental wellbeing from failure.
If you go in, all guns blazing, saying you are confident you will do something, then you don't achieve it, you think you'll feel rubbish. You think other people will judge you for it. You'll think you aren't good enough. If you say you will breastfeed and then hit a stumbling block, you may be disappointed.
If you tell yourself and others that you will try to breastfeed, or try to have a positive birth, you think that if you don't do it, you only said you'd try. So it isn't the end of the world if it doesn't happen? It doesn't feel as much of a let down, because you already told yourself it might not be possible.
WRONG ATTITUDE people.
By telling yourself you'll try, you are giving in to yourself, to societal pressure and setting yourself up for things not to go how you want. When we say we will try, we generally want to achieve that thing. We don't want to try it, we want to DO IT.
Language is a really powerful thing and can actually pre-empt how things may go.
You don't need to be fearful of failure. You can't fail at anything in the birth or parenting world. If you want to do something, but it doesn't go the way you planned, you find another way around it. You don't need to try to be anything. You need to think in the present, positively.
Instead of try, say that you will. Or you can. This slight change in language will make the world of difference to your mindset.
Thank me later ;)